Sing, Barren Woman!

As I have been meditating on Isaiah 54 some things have come to mind. I will share briefly these thoughts:  I am realizing that I am always wanting everything to line up perfectly. I always want to have the perfect day, have the "perfect" life, the perfect relationship, the perfect car, etc. But, in that desiring for everything to be perfect I am pushing the need for God right out of my life.  It shows little trust. Without thinking about it, I am saying "God I want my life to be so great that I don't need you". And obviously, that statement is wrong. However, I believe we say this in such subtle ways that we don't even realize it.  IF we had the perfect family, would we have the deep need to pray for them? If we had the perfect, easy job, would we need to depend on God to get through our day? These are just questions I have been asking myself as I look at Isaiah 54. It says that the barren woman is blessed.  But how can that be? How can it be that a woman who wants to have children is blessed if she cannot? I believe one of the reasons is because she will rely more on God. She will cry out to God for him to open her womb. It is an opportunity to cry out to the one who desires relationship.  Just like Hannah in the bible- she cried out for a child, and God opened her womb. But the relationsip and dynamic that happened wouldn't have happened if she had had children with no problem- perhaps she wouldn't have even given God a second thought. 

Here is Isaiah 54:1-9

“Sing, barren woman,
    you who never bore a child;
burst into song, shout for joy,
    you who were never in labor;
because more are the children of the desolate woman
    than of her who has a husband,”
says the Lord.
2 “Enlarge the place of your tent,
    stretch your tent curtains wide,
    do not hold back;
lengthen your cords,
    strengthen your stakes.
3 For you will spread out to the right and to the left;
    your descendants will dispossess nations
    and settle in their desolate cities.

4 “Do not be afraid; you will not be put to shame.
    Do not fear disgrace; you will not be humiliated.
You will forget the shame of your youth
    and remember no more the reproach of your widowhood.
5 For your Maker is your husband—
    the Lord Almighty is his name—
the Holy One of Israel is your Redeemer;
    he is called the God of all the earth.
6 The Lord will call you back
    as if you were a wife deserted and distressed in spirit—
a wife who married young,
    only to be rejected,” says your God.
7 “For a brief moment I abandoned you,
    but with deep compassion I will bring you back.
8 In a surge of anger
    I hid my face from you for a moment,
but with everlasting kindness
    I will have compassion on you,”
    says the Lord your Redeemer.

It's amazing to think how God so beautifully weaves our lives into an elaborate journey. One moment we think we have got it all figured out, and the next moment totally takes us by surprise!
After 2 years of being home, God is gracing me with the opportunity of a short term mission trip!
An opportunity to go to Africa, with a group from the Gateway House of Prayer in St. Louis has opened. It will be a 2 week trip in November! I am delighted, and so grateful to have this opportunity set before me. God is so good! God is so faithful!

Isaiah 49:13-16

Shout for joy, O heavens;
rejoice, O earth;
burst into song, O mountains!
For the Lord comforts his people
and will have compassion on his
afflicted ones.

But Zion said" The Lord has forsaken me.
the Lord has forgotten ."

Can a mother forget the baby at her breast
and have no compassion on the child
she has borne?
Though she may forget,
I will not forget you!

See, I have engraved you on the palms of
my hands;
your walls are ever before me. . .


I love this verse. We cans see God's compassion and love for Israel.  He never forgets, and he carries his children. In his love for Israel we can see his character for those of us that have been grafted into this very family. If a mother cannot forget her own child, how could God forget us? And he has tatooed  Israel into his hands, and us if we have made Jesus our Lord.

He looks at His hand and sees "Rachael Needham" (or insert your own name), and thinks, "oh yea, my beloved...I remember her...how could I forget...I love her"...

I love you Jesus

Psalm 103:13 As a father has compassion on his children, so the Lord has compassion on those who fear him;

As I was sitting, listening to the Lord, trying to figure out this season that I am in...I heard this:

Grandpa James, and Ira James 

" Rachael, I am breaking you free from fear of man. BREAKING YOU FREE, from fear of man. I am chiseling you out of that iceberg of paralysis. 
Remember, my daughter, you have a big Daddy in heaven who has ALL the authority.
And this big daddy, is your defender. He backs your decisions. By the blood of Jesus, he puts his seal of approval on over you. He backs you up, and will defend every accusation."

I am reminded that,He knew what He was getting into when He called me. He is not shocked by my weakness. He is not shocked by my brokenness. And only He sees the end from the beginning.

A Change in the Wind

I recently made one of the hardest decisions of my life. That decision was to not go back to Guatemala this next year. I did not take this decision lightly, and it was not with out hours of counsel from friends, family, and most importantly God. I had many sleepless nights. I cried out to the Lord for months about this decision, even before coming home.  I was so afraid of what people would think or say, that I was paralyzed for a while, to make a decision.  But, after much time, it was only 3 days ago, that I finally heard His still small voice with compassion, and love. He flooded my heart, and room with peace, as I felt a renewed call to my family here in St. Louis. I felt a call to love them, rightly...not as a backseat to "my ministry", or "my church friends"...but to put them before those other things. 

    Yesterday, I sent a letter to my financial supporters to let them know the upcoming changes. Here is an excerpt from that letter. Please read:

It has been a wonderful year! So much has been accomplished. Hundreds of diabetics, people with hypertension, pregnant moms, and malnourished children have passed through our clinic, and have been helped. The widows of a local village, now have a group to gather, and make baskets to sell. We have counseled many situations, and have prayed for healing for many others. We have even seen many come to Christ! What a beautiful thing!

When, I went to Guatemala last year, I went out on an indefinite Journey. I didn’t know if it would be a year, or forever. I told the Fickers, “I will be here for at least a year”. I said that because that is all that the Lord would allow me to see. I knew for sure at least a year.

   I had a prophecy years ago, when I rededicated my life to Christ. This prophecy came at a time that I had never thought about missions. In the prophecy, I was told that they saw me going back and forth from a country.  At the time I had no idea what they were talking about. But now, I am beginning to understand what that looks like.

I say that, so that you will understand the new season I am entering. I am definitely connected to Guatemala in many ways. But it has been confirmed through prayer, dreams, and in my heart, that I will be taking a break from living there.  

I believe that God has a unique calling for each one of us. My unique calling will not look like someone else’s calling. Some missionaries stay forever, others go back and forth, others do short term, and others fund the mission!

I will leave you with this quote:

Mother Theresa was asked how to best promote world peace. Her answer was, "Go home and love your family."

This is the direction I am hearing from the Lord at this time, and I know my ‘family’ of friends, relations, brothers and sisters in Christ, will support and love me in return. I love you all.

For any questions or concerns please contact me at Rachael.needham@gmail.com

With Love,

Rachael Needham

2013

  I've been home now for a month, connecting with friends and family.  I've also been home waiting on the Lord.  I've been praying, watching, and waiting for what he is doing in my life in this season. I just want to be obedient to Him. So far, I've made 2 trips to Kansas city, and have sat in the prayer room for hours, so that my heart will be soft, and my ears will be open.

  I'm unsure of what this year holds for me.  But, I DO know that last year was an amazing year.  It was a year full of new and exciting things, and growing closer to the Lord.  I got to share part of my time, and life with 10 beautiful widows of a very remote village. It was pure joy to share a group with them.

It also was pure joy to pray with hundreds of sick people in clinics. It was also pure joy to see some very malnourished children go from weak, and unhealthy to strong, and smiling. And to see hundreds of pregnant women well taken care of by our prenatal program. Wow! What a year!

But, here it is...2013. A new year. A fresh start. His mercies are new every morning. And I believe they are new every dawn of each year. Lord, have your way in 2013!!

December

Juana smiling with her new sweater

(I had this blog written up, but forgot to post it until now)

We had our Christmas fiesta for the widows.  It was a time of celebrating what has been accomplished, a time to reflect, and a time to look towards the future.

A church in Pennsylvania, through our good friend Adrienne, donated a large sum of money to buy the widows Christmas gifts.
It gets rather cold up in the mountains of Chiminisiguan, so we bought them warm sweaters. We were also able to buy them food, nice baskets, sugar, soap for washing clothes, body soap, and some other useful things for their homes.  

The women were so grateful, and even smiled.  By the end of the party they were giving us whatever they had on them, food, baskets, hugs out of gratefulness. 

It's was a good year...and I am truly blessed to have been able to be apart of these women's lives.