Sing, Barren Woman!

As I have been meditating on Isaiah 54 some things have come to mind. I will share briefly these thoughts:  I am realizing that I am always wanting everything to line up perfectly. I always want to have the perfect day, have the "perfect" life, the perfect relationship, the perfect car, etc. But, in that desiring for everything to be perfect I am pushing the need for God right out of my life.  It shows little trust. Without thinking about it, I am saying "God I want my life to be so great that I don't need you". And obviously, that statement is wrong. However, I believe we say this in such subtle ways that we don't even realize it.  IF we had the perfect family, would we have the deep need to pray for them? If we had the perfect, easy job, would we need to depend on God to get through our day? These are just questions I have been asking myself as I look at Isaiah 54. It says that the barren woman is blessed.  But how can that be? How can it be that a woman who wants to have children is blessed if she cannot? I believe one of the reasons is because she will rely more on God. She will cry out to God for him to open her womb. It is an opportunity to cry out to the one who desires relationship.  Just like Hannah in the bible- she cried out for a child, and God opened her womb. But the relationsip and dynamic that happened wouldn't have happened if she had had children with no problem- perhaps she wouldn't have even given God a second thought. 

Here is Isaiah 54:1-9

“Sing, barren woman,
    you who never bore a child;
burst into song, shout for joy,
    you who were never in labor;
because more are the children of the desolate woman
    than of her who has a husband,”
says the Lord.
2 “Enlarge the place of your tent,
    stretch your tent curtains wide,
    do not hold back;
lengthen your cords,
    strengthen your stakes.
3 For you will spread out to the right and to the left;
    your descendants will dispossess nations
    and settle in their desolate cities.

4 “Do not be afraid; you will not be put to shame.
    Do not fear disgrace; you will not be humiliated.
You will forget the shame of your youth
    and remember no more the reproach of your widowhood.
5 For your Maker is your husband—
    the Lord Almighty is his name—
the Holy One of Israel is your Redeemer;
    he is called the God of all the earth.
6 The Lord will call you back
    as if you were a wife deserted and distressed in spirit—
a wife who married young,
    only to be rejected,” says your God.
7 “For a brief moment I abandoned you,
    but with deep compassion I will bring you back.
8 In a surge of anger
    I hid my face from you for a moment,
but with everlasting kindness
    I will have compassion on you,”
    says the Lord your Redeemer.

It's amazing to think how God so beautifully weaves our lives into an elaborate journey. One moment we think we have got it all figured out, and the next moment totally takes us by surprise!
After 2 years of being home, God is gracing me with the opportunity of a short term mission trip!
An opportunity to go to Africa, with a group from the Gateway House of Prayer in St. Louis has opened. It will be a 2 week trip in November! I am delighted, and so grateful to have this opportunity set before me. God is so good! God is so faithful!

Isaiah 49:13-16

Shout for joy, O heavens;
rejoice, O earth;
burst into song, O mountains!
For the Lord comforts his people
and will have compassion on his
afflicted ones.

But Zion said" The Lord has forsaken me.
the Lord has forgotten ."

Can a mother forget the baby at her breast
and have no compassion on the child
she has borne?
Though she may forget,
I will not forget you!

See, I have engraved you on the palms of
my hands;
your walls are ever before me. . .


I love this verse. We cans see God's compassion and love for Israel.  He never forgets, and he carries his children. In his love for Israel we can see his character for those of us that have been grafted into this very family. If a mother cannot forget her own child, how could God forget us? And he has tatooed  Israel into his hands, and us if we have made Jesus our Lord.

He looks at His hand and sees "Rachael Needham" (or insert your own name), and thinks, "oh yea, my beloved...I remember her...how could I forget...I love her"...

I love you Jesus

Psalm 103:13 As a father has compassion on his children, so the Lord has compassion on those who fear him;

As I was sitting, listening to the Lord, trying to figure out this season that I am in...I heard this:

Grandpa James, and Ira James 

" Rachael, I am breaking you free from fear of man. BREAKING YOU FREE, from fear of man. I am chiseling you out of that iceberg of paralysis. 
Remember, my daughter, you have a big Daddy in heaven who has ALL the authority.
And this big daddy, is your defender. He backs your decisions. By the blood of Jesus, he puts his seal of approval on over you. He backs you up, and will defend every accusation."

I am reminded that,He knew what He was getting into when He called me. He is not shocked by my weakness. He is not shocked by my brokenness. And only He sees the end from the beginning.

A Change in the Wind

I recently made one of the hardest decisions of my life. That decision was to not go back to Guatemala this next year. I did not take this decision lightly, and it was not with out hours of counsel from friends, family, and most importantly God. I had many sleepless nights. I cried out to the Lord for months about this decision, even before coming home.  I was so afraid of what people would think or say, that I was paralyzed for a while, to make a decision.  But, after much time, it was only 3 days ago, that I finally heard His still small voice with compassion, and love. He flooded my heart, and room with peace, as I felt a renewed call to my family here in St. Louis. I felt a call to love them, rightly...not as a backseat to "my ministry", or "my church friends"...but to put them before those other things. 

    Yesterday, I sent a letter to my financial supporters to let them know the upcoming changes. Here is an excerpt from that letter. Please read:

It has been a wonderful year! So much has been accomplished. Hundreds of diabetics, people with hypertension, pregnant moms, and malnourished children have passed through our clinic, and have been helped. The widows of a local village, now have a group to gather, and make baskets to sell. We have counseled many situations, and have prayed for healing for many others. We have even seen many come to Christ! What a beautiful thing!

When, I went to Guatemala last year, I went out on an indefinite Journey. I didn’t know if it would be a year, or forever. I told the Fickers, “I will be here for at least a year”. I said that because that is all that the Lord would allow me to see. I knew for sure at least a year.

   I had a prophecy years ago, when I rededicated my life to Christ. This prophecy came at a time that I had never thought about missions. In the prophecy, I was told that they saw me going back and forth from a country.  At the time I had no idea what they were talking about. But now, I am beginning to understand what that looks like.

I say that, so that you will understand the new season I am entering. I am definitely connected to Guatemala in many ways. But it has been confirmed through prayer, dreams, and in my heart, that I will be taking a break from living there.  

I believe that God has a unique calling for each one of us. My unique calling will not look like someone else’s calling. Some missionaries stay forever, others go back and forth, others do short term, and others fund the mission!

I will leave you with this quote:

Mother Theresa was asked how to best promote world peace. Her answer was, "Go home and love your family."

This is the direction I am hearing from the Lord at this time, and I know my ‘family’ of friends, relations, brothers and sisters in Christ, will support and love me in return. I love you all.

For any questions or concerns please contact me at Rachael.needham@gmail.com

With Love,

Rachael Needham

2013

  I've been home now for a month, connecting with friends and family.  I've also been home waiting on the Lord.  I've been praying, watching, and waiting for what he is doing in my life in this season. I just want to be obedient to Him. So far, I've made 2 trips to Kansas city, and have sat in the prayer room for hours, so that my heart will be soft, and my ears will be open.

  I'm unsure of what this year holds for me.  But, I DO know that last year was an amazing year.  It was a year full of new and exciting things, and growing closer to the Lord.  I got to share part of my time, and life with 10 beautiful widows of a very remote village. It was pure joy to share a group with them.

It also was pure joy to pray with hundreds of sick people in clinics. It was also pure joy to see some very malnourished children go from weak, and unhealthy to strong, and smiling. And to see hundreds of pregnant women well taken care of by our prenatal program. Wow! What a year!

But, here it is...2013. A new year. A fresh start. His mercies are new every morning. And I believe they are new every dawn of each year. Lord, have your way in 2013!!

December

Juana smiling with her new sweater

(I had this blog written up, but forgot to post it until now)

We had our Christmas fiesta for the widows.  It was a time of celebrating what has been accomplished, a time to reflect, and a time to look towards the future.

A church in Pennsylvania, through our good friend Adrienne, donated a large sum of money to buy the widows Christmas gifts.
It gets rather cold up in the mountains of Chiminisiguan, so we bought them warm sweaters. We were also able to buy them food, nice baskets, sugar, soap for washing clothes, body soap, and some other useful things for their homes.  

The women were so grateful, and even smiled.  By the end of the party they were giving us whatever they had on them, food, baskets, hugs out of gratefulness. 

It's was a good year...and I am truly blessed to have been able to be apart of these women's lives.

These are a few of the things for which I give thanks....

Mom and Ira

1.I am so grateful that I was able to take a quick trip home! Not only, did I get to see my dad in Florida, but I also got to surprise my mom in St. Louis, for her 60th birthday! We celebrated with a party of friends and family at my brother Jon's house. 

Kara and Ira

 2.Kara,my sister-in-law! She gracefully, and joyfully made all of mom's party preparations, and decorating. She is such a lovely sister to have.  I also got to spend lots of time with their son, my nephew, Ira James! He is 1 year and 4 months. He is the cutest little boy I have ever laid eyes on. He has red curly hair, and rosy, red cheeks. 

3. I am grateful that God made a way for the widows from a local village to earn an income. Rosemary's Grove is a very unique store, that has a variety of purses, jewelry, and other things from all over the world. All of the products are fair trade and help support people in poverty. This boutique now sells our very own widows' project baskets! I brought these baskets in on my trip, and now these precious ladies will be able to sell their pine needle baskets in this store! This will help support the women earn an income to help support their families.

4. I am grateful to be back, safe and sound in Canilla'. We had clinic today, and we have clinic tomorrow. We are one less person because Katie is visiting family in the States. Then, when she comes back I will be coming to St. Louis, again, in December, for Christmas. 

5.Finally, I would like to thank all my friends and family who support each month through prayer and finances. I am so grateful for everyone of you. I really couldn't do it without you. Thank you.

Blessed be Your name, On the road marked with suffering, Though there's pain in the offering, Blessed be Your name

This is Maria.

On a crisp, fall feeling day in the village of Chiminisiguan, "Maravilloso es Dios. Maravilloso es Dios" softly, sung, danced in the atmosphere, bringing a spiritual warmth upon the clinic. It was one of the widows singing a beautiful song to Jesus in our last meeting. The woman was Maria, a widow who lost her husband 8 years ago, and has 8 children.  What a beautiful thing for a woman who lives in poverty, and who has suffered the pain of loss to praise Jesus in the midst of it all. But, not only that, she was praising Jesus in the midst of a village that seems spiritually dark. Of the 9 women, only 3 of them say they go to church. So to break into praise in the midst of the group, was truly a holy moment.   
  We had our 4th Widows'/women's meeting on Tuesday.  As you can see, it started with a flicker of light. The women, once again, came with enthusiasm, interest, and baskets. It was really a kiss from God being in the midst of that meeting. I can not explain to you what I feel when all the women are there, huddled around the fire place meeting together for a purpose. As I watch them, I see this great potential for a group that would give these woman a safe place to feel loved, and encounter Jesus, together in unity. As I watch them, I feel this great love welling up for each one, and compassion for each one that only comes from God.... And, as I watch them, I also feel the huge weight of responsibility of helping lead God's beloved ones into something new. If often feel so incapable and ill-equipped to do this group well. I found myself asking "what is the purpose of this group, what is the goal? And how are we going to get there?". I know God loves these women. I also, know he will hold me accountable for how I deal with them. He after all, looks after the widow and the orphan. So pray for me please. Pray for wisdom and revelation. Pray that I could do this well. Pray for these woman as well, that they would encounter the love of Jesus.



 Just FYI:  Our cup overflows with these beautiful baskets.The ministry bought every last one of them. The plan is to sell these baskets to fund this project for these women. So when I come home for the holidays, I will have tons of baskets for sale:) If you need any Christmas gift ideas :) They are beautiful, and come with a tag that has the picture and story of the woman that made the basket.)

A father to the fatherless, a defender of widows, is God in his holy dwelling. Psalm 68:5

At our second Widows' meeting,the Lord was so good. We gathered by the fire place, and began in prayer. The goal for this meeting was to show the "second step" of making a pine needle basket...but to my joy and surprise the ladies brought in several finished, beautiful handwoven pine needle baskets!

The most beautiful basket was intricately hand-made by a widow well known to us, her name is Marta. Her son, Miguel, is on the nutrition program, and came into us in the final stages of malnutrition. He had severe signs of the common form of malnutrition here, due to a protein deficient diet. His hands and feet were swollen making it obvious that he was suffering. Little Miguel would not smile. His life-less face spoke only of the pain of having no father, and no food. We laid hands on him, and pleaded for our heavenly Father to hear our cry. Then,even though Miguel was a bit older than most of our nutrition kids, but we started him on the program.  Every two weeks we gave him a supply of milk, vitamins, and "incaparina" (a vitamin shake).  Slowly, but surely, he changed. His weight increased each time he came to the clinic. Soon, he was even smiling, showing his improvement. It is due to our good, good father in heaven, that Miguel is now a healthy little boy.  

So, when Marta came with her beautiful basket to sell, it meant more to us than just a basket. It meant food on the table for her little boy.
And that, my friends, is why we do this...to follow in the footsteps of our Lord, and Savior. Doing what the Father does..He is, after all  "A Father to the fatherless, a defender of the widows"...

Pray for Miguel...pray for Marta...

Meet the Women of the Widows' Project

Add caption

This is Tomasa. She is a widow that AIM (Adonai International Ministries)  has been friends with for many years. AIM first met Tomasa through her husband, who was a community leader from her village, and was dying of cancer.  The Lord used AIM to help her husband as much as they could, but he eventually passed away. This left Tomasa with seven children. AIM provides her with food monthly, and is she now apart of the Widow's project. Pray that she grows deeper with Christ during this season, and for provision for her family.

This is Delia. Delia is from a rural, village near our town of Canilla', Guatemala. Her husband abandoned her, and the children seven years ago. In addition to her own natural children, Delia took in a baby girl that was not her own, after the natural mother died. The little girl is now on our nutrition program due to being malnourished, and in a constant fight with respiratory sickness.  Delia now, "fights", as her neighbors put it, to provide for her children on a daily basis. Pray for her provision, and that she develops a personal relationship with her Savior, Jesus. Pray for health for this family.


These are just two of the six women that have begun to meet biweekly in a group. Tomorrow, will be meeting number three. Please pray God meets these women in a unique, and personal way. Pray for provision. But most importantly, pray that we are able to show these women Jesus in the midst of their struggles. 

My Father's House

Abba Father
My Defender
You are Holy
And I surrender
For in my weakness
You protect me
When my heart strays
You Correct me

I cry Abba Father -
I love you, Daddy
Abba Father...
I love you, I love you
I cry Abba Father -
I love you, Daddy
Abba Father..
I love you I love you
Daddy
Every time we sing this song during our worship on Tuesday nights, I cry. Every time...

This past Tuesday was no exception. I sat with my eyes closed focusing on the words, and my mind's eye swept away to my own earthly father.I suddenly pictured his house, where I often come to visit. I began to comprehend the parallel between him and my Father in heaven.  For the first time, as I counted the wonders of my own father, I realized my Father in heaven was just the same...

In my father's house I am always welcome. I have a warm bed to sleep on. I have good food to eat.  My father's cabinets are never bare, instead, there is always plenty. And, he tells me I am welcome to anything I desire. My father keeps nothing from me, but is instead generous. My father is not poor but rich....rich in love, rich in kindness, and rich in mercy. My father never requires me to perform, or earn his love, but instead I can rest in knowing that he loves me. Whenever, I enter my father's house I know that I am special. When I am with him, there is no other daughter he is thinking of...just me.

 I am his only daughter. 



  In My Father’s house are many dwelling places; if it were not so, I would have told you; for I go to prepare a place for you.³ If I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and receive you to Myself, that where I am,there you may be also. John 14:1-2



song: Album- Invitation To Eavesdrop

Fuego

The volcano in Antigua, Guatemala erupted today. There were some very amazing photos posted on the Antigua Facebook page (as seen above). We were unaffected by it here in Canilla', El Quiche, Guatemala. However, Duane had a flight to Guatemala City today, and he said he saw it.  He said he saw it raining ash, and could see the puffs of smoke in the air. But, God is good, and the flight was made back home safely. We do know though that there are lives being affected by it, so we pray for help and protection for those families near the volcano! 

For more information on this eruption click this link: http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-latin-america-19594481

My soul clings to You; Your right hand upholds me. Psalm 63:8

^{Dear Heavenly Father,}

      ^{Thank you for your son Jesus. Father, I desire to be with him, where He is, to behold His beauty, all the days of my life. I want to be lost in the river of fire, the river of desire for more of Him every single day. One thing I desire of the Lord, to behold his beauty, and to be found in Him. Lord, you can take everything, but one thing I desire to dwell with you, and behold your glory. Everything else fades, but one thing remains....Fix my eyes on eternity.} 

^{Help me to forget what lies behind. Help me to come into the fullness of your forgiveness. Help me not to rely on past failures, or past successes, but instead to press on toward the goal of knowing you. I don't want to live in the memory of yesterday, but I want to live in today.}

^{Lord, I want to be zealous for you for decades. I want to be hungry for you, desiring more and more of you everyday. I want to be on fire for you in my 60's, 70's, 80's....But I know, it's not about what I do, what I earn...but about what Jesus did on the cross. There is nothing I can do to add to His blood.}

^{So, help me to live out of the overflow of your pursuit for me....}

^{My soul clings to You;
Your right hand upholds me.}

this is my prayer after listening to a teaching by Corey Russell called "Staying on Fire for Decades"

From Ashes to Joy

Four, beautiful, Mayan, widowed woman huddled by the fireplace.  The lines on their faces, tell of the hardship they have endured during their lifetime....war, poverty, and abandonment.  Who can 
"bestow on them a crown of beauty,
 instead of ashes,
the oil of joy,
instead of mourning,
and a garment of praise
    instead of a spirit of despair?"
There's only one, found worthy. His name is Jesus.






 We've been in prayer for months now, about a project that will help the many widows in the particular village/area of Chiminisiguan. The ministry has been helping these many widows in many ways for a long time...but recently, the desire arose to start a project/group that would provide a place for widows to have community, hear the gospel, and provide them with a skill or trade to help earn income. So, after many months of prayer, on Tuesday we had our first meeting.

  After the nutrition kids, and some general consults we invited the widows into the clinic to start a meeting. Meanwhile, the medical clinic carried on as usual. We opened the meeting with prayer, and an explanation of the purpose of the group. We also asked if anyone had a trade, or skill, that they knew to make, or sell. The general consensus was "no". Then, we began showing them how to make pine needle  baskets that are simple and easy to make.  Pines grow all around this area, so the materials would be easy to obtain. To my surprise, it really seemed to take off! They learned very quickly, and better yet, they seemed to enjoy making them! After working on the baskets for awhile,we asked the group, when they would like to meet again. When given the choice of one month, or 2 weeks, they all chose 2 weeks!  

Now, when you've worked with areas like this before, you know that this can only be God. I've had enough experience working in these areas and other parts of Guatemala to know that normally, when starting a program, you try, and try, and try to stir up interest to no avail.  I give all glory to God who gave the timing and the setup.  Now, I also know this was just the first meeting and many trials may come, however, I am so grateful as it seems that God is in this! It's not just another program or activity. 


I believe God is going to move through this program to reveal Himself a little more to the woman. 

Please be in prayer that Jesus is known to these widows. I speak Isaiah 61 over each one of these woman:

Instead of your shame
    you will receive a double portion,
and instead of disgrace
    you will rejoice in your inheritance.
And so you will inherit a double portion in your land,
    and everlasting joy will be yours.

A Sign and A Wonder

Today after our village clinic, eight of us Guatemalans, and non-Guatemalans piled in the back of the red pickup truck to set off for home. It was an adventurous ride, as we rounded windy dirt roads, that the rain had long since washed out. We couldn't help but laugh, as we bounced and the truck bottomed out several times along the road. One of the translators yelled out "We're like popcorn"...Someone else shouted "It's like we are all in a blender." We held on tight, and soon the rain began to fall, a light spring-like rain that made you feel alive. As we climbed down the mountain side, I prayed in my head, "Lord, I need a sign and wonder about staying here longer into next year."  Which, looking back, seems a very selfish prayer...but God is so gracious that he heard me. Just as I finished praying, we turned a corner,and through the valley was rainbow, so close you could almost touch it.  Now, I have seen alot of rainbows in my life time...In fact, I probably could remember the first rainbow I've seen when I was about 5 years old and we lived in our old farm house. But, this rainbow was unlike any other. It was the biggest, brightest, and closest rainbow, that I have ever seen. I was in awe. It was my wonder....
But, I still needed a sign.

  We pulled into home, and the house was full of guests. We have two doctors, a midwife, the midwife's son, a single 20 something girl, and our three Mayan translators all staying with us! So, it felt like camp tonight, with lively chaos...people everywhere, and the dinner table was full! We talked, played cards, watched movies...And after, the evening was over, and I crawled off to bed, I turned on my computer to check my email. "Notification of a Donation received" was in my email inbox. I opened my email and saw that some on-fire prophetic friends from my home town, The Berwicks, had made a generous donation. That was my sign.

Mayan Rituals

1  In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. ^2 [a]He was in the beginning with God. ³  All things came into being through Him, and apart from Him nothing came into being that has come into being. ⁴  In Him was life, and the life was the Light of men. ⁵  The Light shines in the darkness, and the darkness did not ^[b]comprehend it. John 1:1-5

Today, we trekked once more, into the village of Chumisa, to set up clinic for the day.  We worked out of plastic medicine boxes, in small dark adobe homes, and saw 90 or so people. Fortunately, all of our translators came, and we were able to be very efficient in attending to all the sick.  When our day had come to completion, we stood beside the truck waiting for our village guide to lead us to a home visit of a very sick woman. As we stood there, we looked upon a site that appeared to be a Mayan ceremonial site.  There were two large charred pieces of ground where fires had been. Flowers, had been strewn about, in a circle. And, beside this spot was a kind of an arch way made with green bambo that served to encircle another area that had pine needles all over the ground. As we were examining the area, our friend, translator, and local pastor, Armando begin to describe the Mayan rituals that he believed must have taken place there. He began to describe the Mayan rituals that included sacrificing chickens to pay for sins, followed by blessings by the local Catholic priest.  

There is no litmus test for spirituality. But, to me, this was a perfect picture of the spiritual state of this particular village. There is a mixture of Catholicism with Mayan Religious sacrifices that has tried to replace the fact that Jesus is the perfect and pure sacrifice. Jesus, was the ultimate sacrifice when he died on the cross! He is still the ultimate sacrifice today! There need not be any more sacrifices of animals to pay for sins! HE paid for our sins once and for all!  

There is no litmus for spirituality. But, this Mayan ceremonial site was a great reminder of the village's need for Jesus. It made me more aware of the need for the light to pierce the darkness, and for the darkness to comprehend the light. 

an elderly woman from Chumisa

 Sometimes, as we work in these villages, and the spiritual atmosphere feels so heavy, I often wonder why. I wonder why, while these truths are going forth as our friend preaches at every clinic, do the people seem so dull to understand? We need a transformation in these villages. Transformation has to take place, or they will be stuck in their rituals that lead them to ultimate destruction. How does transformation take place, you ask? Prayer, prayer, and more prayer.

Join us in crying out for these villages! 

Dear Father in heaven,

Come to Chumisa! Change and transform this village! Let truth pierce hearts! May they know your son, Jesus!

Amen